Pleasure

My life got stolen.
My life stopped moving on. 
My life got interrupted.
All of my plans got cancelled. 
I lost everything. 
My love life is over. 
It feels so unfair. 
I feel old. 
I miss my life. 

….. 

I could go on forever with all of the phrases that I heard in 2020 from my clients and friends expressing a feeling of complete loss, hopelessness and disillusion. 

I also felt lost. 

And I also felt that I lost everything. 

But, then as a matter of fact, I was finally able to see the silver lining of it - when we think that we lost everything and so we have nothing else to lose - better to take risks, to gamble on our life with a bigger bet, to just do it without the fear of failure and to finally ask ourselves the right question: “What do I truly want?”

And, if we carefully pay attention to the real answer, not the one coming from our thinking, but the one coming from our feeling, we will choose Life! Pleasure! Fun! 

Aliveness! 

And, that notion of aliveness is always present in family constellations, welcoming back the gift of Life from our parents, recognizing the deceased and letting them be, acknowledging the secrets that have been weighing as a heavy burden on the family system, disentangling ourselves from someone’s else destiny and finally bringing back together what was once separated. 

And all of these different dynamics have one common goal… Feeling, and being alive, again. Taking ownership of our life and being fully responsible for it. Receiving from our past and family in order to be fully functional in our present moment. 

Family Constellations is all about reconciliation with Life. And who reconciling with life means enjoying, having and feeling pleasure and through that new sense of perception, we can deeply connect to the beauty of our destiny. 

And so that’s what I want all of us to do this year, despite the circumstances, to not forget that life is still happening, that no one stole your life and to use that rage to create the life that you deeply want. 

Stop staying stuck in your corner, stop taking the role of the victim and be unapologetic about what you desire. 

You are the only one standing between your dream life and your shitty show that right now is happening in your head, convincing yourself that you cannot do anything. 

Pleasure will win over your fears. 

So, as for now, I vividly encourage you to lead your life with pure enjoyment and looking for pleasure every day. 

Marine Sélénée